Counterfeit Boyfriend Page 11

  “O-M-G! You’re practically hyperventilating at the thought! I’ll have you know, I’m a really good driver—that flat tire wasn’t my fault.”

  “But I like driving. I like being able to push faster on the open road, and more than that, I like having you as copilot. You’re good with the snacks…”

  She tossed an M&M at me, and when I caught it in my mouth, she clapped like I was a circus monkey. “You can keep going with the compliments. I pick the best music…”

  “Hell, no.”

  “Ah!” She tossed an M&M at me, hard and without an arch, and I brought up my shoulder just in time to block it from pelting me in the face. “Oops, sorry,” she said with a laugh.

  “That’d be more convincing if you weren’t laughing. Now you don’t get to hear the rest of what I was going to say.”

  “Oh, come on. I’ll even get the M&M before it melts.” She shifted, pushing onto her knees and then leaning over the console and fishing around on the floor at my feet.

  Let the record show that I, Ethan Haynes, resisted making a “while you’re down there” joke. Barely, but it still counts.

  Gwen popped back up, so quickly that if I hadn’t jerked back, the top of her head would’ve smacked my jaw.

  “Woman, you’re going to wreck us.”

  Her lips stuck out in a pout and she crossed her arms, which only emphasized her cleavage. “That was the worst copilot compliment ever. I’m about to throw more M&Ms at you, and if you think I’m going to retrieve them now, you’d better think again.”

  Since I wanted to get my mouth on those alluring lips—and the cleavage to be totally honest—I said, “I was going to say, you also have the best sense of humor about everything, and…”

  She leaned closer, her sweet scent invading my senses. The exit that’d take us toward D.C. was coming up, and if I didn’t pay attention, I’d miss it. Of course right now, I was thinking a detour would be a great idea, which was why I should stay the course. Also why I shouldn’t say what I was tempted to. “And…?”

  “And I like the feel of driving a fast car and having my girl by my side.” Yeah, my self-control clearly sucked.

  The smile she flashed me gave me more wicked ideas and had me clenching the steering wheel tighter, fighting my inner Jekyll. Or was it Hyde? Whichever was the inner villain—that was the one who was winning. “Are you saying I’m your ride or die chick?”

  I chuckled, then locked my eyes on to hers. “Call it whatever you want, as long as I get to call you mine.”

  “If you keep talking like that, tonight’s going to end much better than last night.” Her voice dripped with innuendo, and my cock swelled, testing the confines of my zipper.

  As torturous as it was, I’d liked last night. And while I would definitely like what she was suggesting, it didn’t change the fact that I couldn’t go there.

  Regardless of the way my mind flooded with a sexy image reel of exactly how I’d like it to go down. Claiming her mouth with mine. Peeling off her clothes one at a time. Kissing my way down her body.

  Holy shit I was in trouble. In the matter of minutes I’d gone from worrying I was accidentally screwing it all up to wondering if it wouldn’t be better for all parties involved if I fucked things up on purpose.

  Before I went and did something neither one of us would ever forgive me for.

  18 Gwen

  “No, no, you’re going to break it,” I said, reaching for my backpack, despite handing it over to Evan all of five seconds ago.

  “You asked for help with the stuck zipper,” he said, a statement I couldn’t deny.

  “That’s because I didn’t realize you’d try to rip apart the seams.”

  “I’m not going to—” A loud noise rent the air. Not a zipping sound, either. Nope, definitely a fabric-tearing sound.

  My mouth hung open and Evan’s expression mirrored mine.

  “Hulk smash!” he suddenly shouted, bringing his fist down on my bag. Then he grimaced. “Would now be a bad time to bring up how if you think about it, it’s kind of your fault for asking the Hulk to help you open something that clearly needed to be done with more finesse?”

  “Oh, great. The guy I’m taking with me to a wedding is going to smash it. If only I knew before the carnival that you turned into a brute when angry.”

  He hung his head and held my ripped bag toward me. “Hulk sorry.”

  I sighed, then opened the door to the car and tossed my backpack inside. “Guess there’s no reason to take it now.”

  “I’ll carry everything.”

  “Clearly you have no idea how many souvenirs I’m planning on buying.”

  “Remember how strong the Hulk is?”

  “How can I forget when he just shredded my bag?” I gave him a mock dirty look edged with a pinch of real dirty look because I’d clearly told him to stop.

  He gave me puppy dog eyes—you’d think I’d be immune to them with how many I dealt with on a day to day basis. Evan hooked his finger through my belt loop, tugged me closer, and softly kissed me.

  As much as I loved puppy kisses, Evan’s were far superior, not to mention less messy. I couldn’t help reciprocating, moving my lips with his and winding my arms around his neck.

  “Am I forgiven?” he asked.

  “I plead the fifth.”

  “Already using my job against me.”

  “I figure if I’m going to date a lawyer, I’d better learn to play dirty.”

  He playfully pinched my side. Then he tucked me under his arm and started toward the tall spire of the Washington Monument. “We better get a move-on, or we’re not going to be able to see all the sights we want to.”

  “Leading the witness,” I said, probably a smidge too proud of myself for using that, and a might too happy to be led by him, too.

  Over the next hour, we took pictures as we walked through the World War II memorial, then alongside of the Lincoln Memorial Reflecting pool. We paused for more pictures as we approached the giant seated Lincoln statue.

  A slightly different mood hit us as we stepped inside the building, one full of reverence and awe. I laced my fingers with Evan’s, and he gave my hand a genial squeeze.

  “Would it hurt my rep as a superhero if I recited you the Gettysburg Address without reading it off the wall?”

  “Well, technically the Hulk is Bruce Banner, and he’s a total nerd. So I’d more say it’d be fitting.”

  Evan’s jaw dropped. “Nerd? This coming from the girl who says ‘well, technically.’”

  “Unlike some people I know, I’ve never kept my nerd status a secret. Never claimed to be a superhero, either. Cough, cough.”

  My boyfriend threw his hand to his chest, as if I’d daggered his heart with my words.

  I giggled and snuggled closer to him, moving his hand to cover the spot over his heart with mine. “You misunderstood.” I twisted us so that I could see the famous presidential speech but Evan couldn’t. “I’d be totally into it.”

  “Four score and seven years ago…” he started, and as he rattled it off, here in this place where I could feel the history underneath our feet, the impact of the way the man honored had changed the world, I fell a little bit harder for Evan Haynes.

  As promised, Evan carried all of my souvenirs. While both of us agreed we’d love to spend more time in D.C., the traffic would be getting bad soon, and I’d already gotten two texts from my parents asking when we’d be there. Guess we’d have to hit the Philly stuff on the way back if we had any time to spare, but I didn’t regret taking longer to really enjoy this stop.

  It’d been nice to forget about what was coming tonight and tomorrow. Admittedly, I’d worried more than once that my parents wouldn’t like Evan. Sure he was charming, but he’d never been very serious or career-driven before. I was seeing a whole other side of him, though, and I had a feeling my mom would adore this version of my boyfriend.

  That upped the pressure even as it brought comfort.

  Since I wanted to h
old on to the comfort, I wasn’t going to think about my dad’s opinion—he’d been overprotective before everything went to shit with Kyle.

  “Car’s this way,” Evan said as I tugged him toward the intersection to cross the street.

  “I know, but we need to make one more quick stop. It’ll be like a drive-by. But you know, with walking. So a walk-by.” I’d noticed a building on the map, one that wouldn’t have caught my attention before, but after what Evan had said about being a lawyer… well, I hoped I was leading us somewhere he’d appreciate.

  His footsteps slowed as we neared the building with the sign declaring it the Robert F. Kennedy Department of Justice Building.

  “A whole building dedicated to justice,” I said. “I assume anyway. This is a big law place, right? Or was it just historically a law place, and I’ve had us walk over here for noth—”

  Evan bracketed my face with his hands and crushed his lips to mine. He kissed me thoroughly, glanced at the building with awe, then kissed me again. “Thank you.”

  Warm tingles danced up and down my spine. “Sure thing. Seemed silly to be this close and not see it. Would you ever want to work there?”

  “Hell no,” he said. “I’ll stick to the lower profile cases. But seeing it is… It’s…”

  “Your inner fangirl is squeeing?”

  A crooked grin spread across his face. “If I admit that, I’m afraid I’ll have to kick my own ass. There’s you being into nerds, and then there’s me embarrassing myself.”

  “Honestly, it’s good to see you so passionate about something. Maybe eventually you might want to work at an office besides your dad’s. I know he’s always on you, and you say you can’t live up to who he wants you to be, and I’d imagine that’s pretty stifling.”

  His expression shifted, more serious with an edge of something else. Only for a moment and then he hugged me again. “You are the coolest, you know that?”

  “Of course, but sometimes other people don’t see it,” I joked.

  “Idiots,” he whispered. He took one last long look at the building and then we assumed the position that was quickly becoming a favorite—his arm around my shoulders with me tucked securely to his side—and headed toward the car.

  I leaned in to his embrace, practically floating.

  I’d barely clicked my seatbelt into place when my phone buzzed at my hip. I pulled it out of my pocket, sure it’d be another text from my mom. Instead, it was Tori.

  Tori: I tried to be patient, but remember how I’m living vicariously through you? Have you and Evan banged one out yet?

  Tori: Two out yet?

  Tori: Three?! OMG, you nympho!

  Tori: But seriously, I’m going to text until you answer, and you know I have nothing to do now that you’re not here to hang out with.

  “Everything all right?” Evan asked, making me jump and drop my phone. I quickly snatched it back up. His eyebrows drew together. “You look a little flushed.”

  “All that exercise. Walking. And… getting in the car.” Yeah, way to brag about how you can get out of breath sitting and putting on a seatbelt. That’s super believable.

  Although, honestly, not as far of a stretch as it should be…

  My phone vibrated in my hand.

  I swiped my hair behind my ear and cleared my throat. “Tori’s just being Tori. Basically she’s being a needy wench, and I mean that in the most loving way. In fact, I’m going to tell her that, because I think it’s on the British side of the spectrum, which will make her happy. Although I’m not sure she deserves for me to make her happy right now.”

  Evan nodded, his expression slightly vacant. As big of a fan as Tori was as Evan, I worried he didn’t especially like her. Admittedly, she was an acquired taste and took some time to get used to. With things progressing between Evan and me, it felt even more important they like each other, but I’d have to worry about how to accomplish that later. After I shut off the stream of texts.

  Me: OMG, you needy wench! Stop blowing up my phone!

  Tori: Ugh, so you haven’t had sex with him yet.

  Me: Why do you say that?

  Tori: Because if you’d been laid, you wouldn’t be so grumpy.

  Tori: Unless it was bad. Don’t tell me it was bad. It’s such a disappointing shame when hot guys end up being mediocre in bed.

  Tori: Probably because they never had to try. Wankers.

  Me: Judging from the kissing that won’t be a problem. And before you ask then what am I waiting for, I had an allergy attack last night. My ice cream had peanut butter, so I took a couple of Benadryl and passed out, but not before saying embarrassing stuff, apparently.

  Tori: WHERE’S YOUR EPIPEN? DON’T TELL ME YOU’RE TRAVELING WITHOUT IT!!!!!!!!!!!

  “Oh my gosh, now Tori’s lecturing me on using my EpiPen,” I mumbled.

  “As she should,” Evan helpfully added. Well, at least they found common ground.

  Me: I have it and I’ll use it if I need to. As for the other thing…

  I glanced at Evan, admiring his handsome profile and the way his long fingers curled around the steering wheel. The thick traffic meant he was concentrating on the road, and I should get to being a better copilot. But since that’d be hard to do with Tori texting every five seconds—not to mention Evan might see the texts while I was showing him the directions on my phone, and then I’d have to die, come back from the grave, and haunt my best friend—I decided to tell her what she wanted to hear.

  Me: As soon as I get the chance, I’m totally jumping my boyfriend’s bones.

  As I hit send, my resolve strengthened. Last night had been a bit of a disaster, almost like once I’d decided to have sex with my boyfriend the universe was like “oh no you don’t.”

  But now that we’d gotten that out of the way, surely karma would give me a break and give me the night I deserved with my amazing, sexy, nerdier-than-expected boyfriend.

  19 Ethan

  The two-story house loomed in front of us, the bright-yellow light flooding the windows at odds with the doom and gloom brewing inside of me.

  Great. More nice people to pull into this switcheroo scheme. Just what I needed to feel even worse.

  “Do you think Horny’s had enough alone-time with his rainbow?” Gwen asked, those dimples flashing. “I thought you might want to grab him. Show off to my family what I won for you so they know I’m a good provider and all that jazz.”

  “Well, if he’s not done yet, he’s lost his chance,” I said, grabbing the ridiculous stuffed creature. “And of course I want to show it off. Plus I need to cuddle with it tonight to help keep the monsters away.”

  “Oh. I kinda hoped you’d be cuddling with me.” She batted her eyes and gave me a come hither look I desperately wanted to answer.

  Desire rose, hot and fast, and if only it’d burn away the conflicted sensation that’d seized hold of my internal organs, that’d turn the day back to perfect. In spite of spending the last few hours alternating between how much I sucked and was a big, fat liar and telling myself to simply enjoying being with Gwen while it lasted, I’d still had an amazing day.

  Not only was the girl beautiful, witty, and kind, she’d walked us by the Department of Justice building because she knew I’d love it.

  See. She knows me.

  “Evan?”

  My stomach bottomed out, even as everything else in me tightened to the snapping point. Everything except my name.

  It was a big fucking thing, one I wished wasn’t so important. Tucking the rainbow-humping unicorn under one arm, I hiked my duffel bag strap higher on the other and rounded the hood. “Yes, Guinevere?”

  Her smile lit me up inside—at least I knew her full name now, and if she was going to beam at me like that when I said it, I was going to say it a lot more.

  “I asked if you were ready to go inside,” she said. “I promise it’s less scary than the lighthouse. And if you’re that scared of sleeping on a floor that’s two stories high, we can set you up downst
—”

  I lunged at her and she giggle-shrieked. I buried my face in her neck and rubbed my scruffy chin over her skin and she laughed some more. Then her fingers circled one of my arms and she turned her head so our mouths aligned.

  Since I sucked at following through at things I shouldn’t be doing with Gwen, I captured her lips with mine, molding her to me as I plunged my tongue inside her hot, sweet mouth. I kept telling myself if I could sneak one more taste, I’d at least have that to hold on to, but all it did was make me want to take another taste.

  And another.

  Vaguely I registered her suitcase tipping over and hitting the sidewalk as her other hand came up and ran across my scalp. I dropped everything in my hands in favor of getting them on her ass. I boosted her into my arms, moaning at the way she fitted against me, her warm center now lined up perfectly with my arousal and sending it to a whole new level. There was way too much material in the way, and lust took the wheel, steering me toward throwing her in the backseat of the Camaro and stripping her bare.

  A bright light clicked on to my left, followed by the clearing of a throat.

  My attention automatically swung to where it’d come from, the words on the tip of my tongue in the “go the fuck away” range, but then I registered the redhaired woman and a burly man who looked like the type I’d need to defend for premeditated murder one day. Only I wouldn’t be around, because clearly his murderous plans were for me.

  “Mom! Dad! Hey!” Gwen’s voice was higher pitched than usual, making us seem even guiltier than we were, which, considering the circumstance was pretty damn guilty. She unhooked her ankles and lowered herself to the ground in one torturous drag that did the opposite of helping my downstairs situation.

  Despite my raging erection, I quickly bent and picked up my carnival prize, glad I’d grabbed it. One horny unicorn to help cover up one horny counterfeit boyfriend.

  “Your dad is intense,” I whispered once her parents left us alone at the set dinner table. Gwen’s mom had greeted me warmly, and for once I’d channeled my brother to get out of trouble instead of into it. The kind of charm that came so naturally to him and got him off the hook seemed to work on Mrs. Cosgrave, but Mr. Cosgrave, who I suspected moonlighted as a drill sergeant, wasn’t having it.